Y'all Want News From The Lab?
Like a fucking chemist, or one of them bitches with the advanced math degrees nobody knows about.
Earlier in the week, I told y’all I had some career-related shit that took a broad by surprise. Allow me to elaborate.
I’ve sometimes posted my engineering columns over on Quora or Medium, just for the people who are the same type of nerd as me. Y’all know if it involves industrial maintenance teams or production lines of any type, it gives me a lady boner. I can’t help it, I have brothers, and they let me play with all their cool-ass toys while my sister was chilling with Barbie and Skipper. Now she’s a gyno-oncology nurse, and here I am.
The column here is my for the free shit I do, where I come to talk and chatter with y’all and whatever else may come to mind. My diary, I guess. But when y’all go and click on my other stuff, over to Medium or Hubpages, or any of my links to my published copy elsewhere, them hos actually pay me.
I know, I still can’t fucking believe it either.
Not too long ago, I sent a few writing samples over to a publisher out of London. They’re internet marketing. You know, you want to know something, so you ask Google a question, it pops up about 62 articles on how you can use said product, who buys said product, practical outlets to purchase said product…? Sounding familiar?
Right. Well, a lot of those products are technical. Heavy equipment. Production line monitoring systems. Construction safety devices. Specialized shit that you kinda need to know what the fuck you’re talking about to write their advertising copy.
So, enter your girl.
Yep. I signed a contract last week that ain’t something to sneeze at. This week I have written about 60k words and if you don’t know how much that is, that’s what I write to you guys times 110 a week. That’s a lot of fucking words.
At first, I was like, meh, ok. Yeah, they’ll send me a few pieces a week, I’ll add it to the other little things I have going on, and just keep hustling the other shit I do for other publishers. Y’all they started this inbox with 30 articles, and every day they add about 30 more. I haven’t stopped writing since I signed on the first day.
I’m exhausted, but that’s not a complaint. Because I’m telling you at this moment, I could go anywhere in the world and have enough of a paycheck to make it, and all I need is this very laptop I’m writing to you from. And that smells suspiciously like freedom to me.
For the first time in my adult life, I am living my absolute dream. I’m doing what I love for a paycheck, I can do it anywhere, at any time, yelling at Puffin to stop pulling my fuzzy sock off my foot, trap music playing in the background, not a person in the world to get on my damned nerves, and y’all know people get all over my damned nerves.
Y’all. Do you know what I am?
I’m an author. A columnist. A real fucking writer for an actual paycheck, nothing else, just that. I’m a writer.
Gimme a second. My chin is trembling.
I did it. I got there. I finally did what I said I was going to do way back when y’all started reading me on Quora. When y’all said, girl, if you don’t have a book, you need to. It’s come to fruition.
Holy fuck. I did it, y’all.
I made it.
So, if you’re looking for me, I’m over here writing the fucking keys off this laptop, trap music playing, Puffins bitch ass stealing my fuzzies. Here’s this morning's motivation, and it’s had me going all night…literally rapping and writing technical applications for solar panel software. Yes, you fucking right, I do that too. Don’t ever underestimate your girl.
“Think Imma need a witness? No Jehovah, nigga.”
Congratulations my dear, you’re on a roll. Comebacks are fun! I’m still working on mine 👍
No more looking back - you aren't going that way. You earned it so don't ever doubt that. Bask in this amazing opportunity, live in the moment, and don't fret about the other aspects of life/love. We are celebrating with you and your future doggos....Congrats 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻