Listen, I’m never surprised at all when I have to come here and talk about the shitty behavior of a man. Never. Not even one time because I assure you, I am fully aware of the fuckery that is men.
What fucks me up is when they can convince a woman to do their bidding for them, especially after they’ve cheated on the woman doing the fucking bidding.
What type of low self-esteem having hos are trading themselves out for these Bozos? Thanks to the wife of David Benjamin Coots, we now know.
Coots, a 49-year-old Washington man, so way too old for these fucking games, was having an affair with a patient. Um, someone remind me later tonight to report this piece of shit to the medical board that oversees Gig Harbor.
Where the fuck was I?
Right. So, this piece of wayward lusting shit is cheating on his wife, in his office during an appointment to begin with, so thank Baby Jesus for that white paper they roll out for you, then ends up with an allegedly pregnant mistress.
Well, that won’t do, clearly, so he decides he’ll just slip her the vaginal abortion pill. Yes, as any sane adulterer would do, just like in the coat hanger days.
The victim stated Coots acted happy about the new bundle baking, even talking about such fatherly issues as which stroller they should buy for the kid. Side note: he was living with his wife and their five children while this all took place.
In other news, the vasectomy has become a popular surgery due to the 3-day maximum recovery time, and the propensity to avoid shit like this.
Back to the fuckery at hand. So, Coots and the mistress are engaged in some adulterous tryst on January 27th, and he pulled a move which gave away his ill intentions, after likely trying to poison her via her coffee the day prior. The woman witnessed a pill fall from her vagina, and then discovered three remaining pills inside her body.
This motherfucker.
The woman confronted Coots, who admitted it was Misoprostol/Cytotec pills. The woman goes to the ER, where they find even more pills inside of her.
Mary, Mother, what is this chic, a fucking PEZ dispenser?
Now, you might think this Bozo would call it a day at this point, but you would fucking be wrong. Coots then offered the mistress money not to go to the police. She was like, ‘sir, kindly kiss both my ass cheeks, your days as a back alley gyno are over, hoss’.
Then, in a move that would make Tammy Wynette envious, Coots wife, Melissa Coots then harasses the woman via text, followed by in person at the home of the mistress. Melissa Coots was also insisting on making payment to the mistress for not informing the cops of her husband’s home obstetrician training.
After being slapped with a restraining order, Coots violated the order when he shows up at the house of the woman’s brother, pulling some crazy shit involving a recently cut key to the woman’s home, and really showing women in the greater Washington area that you must be careful who you allow access to your general vicinity. What if they turn out to be a complete fucking sociopath like Coots? Or his co-dependent imbecile of a wife?
I don’t really have anything else on this. Wait, I do. If your dude gets another woman pregnant, then you harass that woman for him, mail me your Woman card now.
Y’all got the fucking PO box, don’t ask any questions. If you’re stupid enough to be cheated on and take him back, that’s on you. But to harass a victim of an assault by your piece of shit husband. Bitch. Off with your fucking head. You need heavy fucking therapy.
Get some self-esteem, bitch.
Fuck. Just pathetic with this type of shit.