Sometimes, You Gotta Cull...
Old jeans in the back of the closet, the people who no longer wish you well...they gotta go.
Everyone has shit that they wish they could undo.
It’s just a simple fact of life. We all make mistakes, and that’s not some neoyoga fuckery I picked up in prison, that’s the way life is. If you aren’t learning, you aren’t living.
This also means that shit is going to happen that’s going to create friction with other people. You’ll lose some folk along the way. Not everyone is going to be 100% on board with everything you do to live the way you choose to live.
The thing is, if you’re on my team, then dammit you need to be on my team. I’m a lot of things, and I admit freely to them. What I was, though, that’s not who I am today. I have already made those apologies, I have already atoned for those sins. I am a free woman, and if you anticipate me sitting around feeling inadequate or unworthy because I took the road that led directly through hell to get here, well, it seems you really don’t know me at all.
So, that being said, I’ve been going through a cull in my personal life. If I feel you don’t have my best intentions at heart when you’re dealing with me, I can’t affiliate. If you have some ill will, let a Bitchface know. We can easily resolve that lickety split, because my “I don’t know that motherfucker” game is super strong.
I do what I do today, right now, out of sheer will. Nobody handed me shit, I clawed and scraped and fought for both degrees, everything I have, and everything I am known for. So, if anyone thought it was going to slow me down to have everything come down around me like a ton of bricks, you really don’t know how I got the name Bitchface. I am not only unafraid of a fight, I welcome one.
That means bring your fucking A game if you decide I’m the one you want to play with. I don’t leave home without mine.
As for anyone in my world who stood by me when things were low, I love you, and loyalty means everything to me. You know, there is something to be said for people who have no reward for standing by you in the times of harvest, and in the lean season prior, and those people are what are known as solid.
I love a solid bitch. I try to keep only solid bitches on my team.
Take a long look at your own team. I hope all of your bitches are solid as well. But if they aren’t, you need to ask yourself what is it they’re doing there. Don’t ever let someone ride out the high times with you that wasn’t in the trench helping you dig it out. There are too many people already waiting for the high times, you’ll have a bunch more when you get back on top.
I have a few solid people, people that have been on my team since the days of working in the shop, going to school at night and trying to get some type of shot at a life that would make me a better woman than I came from. I found that chance, and I never looked back.
Even today, if you ask me what makes a decent woman, I’ll always say it’s the ability to stand on your own two feet. That I came from a woman who ruined me because she couldn’t leave a pedophile is always the driving force for me, it’s always what makes me have a need to be able to stand up and leave. Because sometimes, the best thing you can do is leave someone behind. Sometimes, you’re just in the wrong place with the wrong person, and it’s nothing but a detriment, weighing you down and keeping you from doing better.
So, I analyze often. If I don’t think you’re on my team, I just don’t associate with you. Ask my family, that’s something I’m super serious about. I would rather be a woman standing all alone in my convictions, than a woman surrounded by people that I can’t trust. I trust me, and that is enough. It could be me versus every motherfucker on this planet, I’m still good. Hell, I’m better than good, because I know whoever comes through the door is on my list, I don’t even need to check I.D.
If you’re feeling like you’ve got some waste in your closet, donate it. The women’s shelters in your area are always happy to have clothing and household wares donated, because a bunch of women leave with nothing. If you’re feeling like you’ve got some baggage in the people in your life, ask yourself if they’re answering the phone when you need something, or only calling when they need you. Everything should be a 2 lane, not a one way. If it isn’t, you’ve got some shit you should probably pack up.
There is no substitution for being able to stand on one's own two feet. I pity the women who have never experienced that, because they will always have the fear that they can't do it.
"No longer accepting the things I cannot change but changing the things I cannot accept", "In life we do things. Some we wish we had never done. Some we wish we could replay a million times in our heads. But they all make us who we are. And in the end they shape every detail about us. If we were to reverse any of them we wouldn't be the person we are today. So just live, make mistakes, have wonderful memories, but never ever second guess who u are, where u've been, and most importantly where it is ur going." "Good days give happiness, bad days give experience, worst days give lessons, & best days give memories!" "Before she became fire, she was water. Quenching the thirst of every dying creature. She gave & she gave until she turned from sea to desert. But instead of dying from the heat, the sadness, the heartache, she took all of her pain & from her own ashes, she became fire!" "She's been through hell & came out an Angel. U didn't break her darling, u don't own that kind of power." Just a few quotes reminded me of u thought I'd share them. Since I can't figure out how to upload a picture (my phone may or may not be full of downloaded quotes off the internet searching for things that resonate w the way I'm feeling at that point in time😂🙈). 💞😘