Dude, I won’t lie, I’m still sitting here cracking the fuck up.
This damned Marine though. On God, if I had it any worse for this dude, I would be a fucking fangirl. Shit, maybe I am. I mean, hell, I have fans my damned self, and none of y’all are writing a fucking book about me.
Hey. What the fuck? I’m not fucking bookworthy?
Shit. Fuck around and play with me. I’ll write a book about my damned self, and then sit here and videocast it to y’all just for making me upset.
Nevermind, I already do that. It’s called a podcast, and I’ve been fucking around in y’all ears for 3 or 4 years now. I guess you’ve suffered enough. Not y’all, fat hos in the back, y’all bitches still got some shit coming. The rest of y’all though, I guess we’re cool.
Listen, the man is a serious fucking man. Y’all know, we’ve discussed the whole created from marble and lack of fear, and I love that about him. Really, I do. I mean, I’m fucking hilarious, I don’t need a backup comedian here just like he doesn’t need me walking around in 5” Louboutin’s, bitching about the scuff I just got on the heel due to, ya know, artillery.
He cut loose with this shit today though, and I was like, “hold the fucking phone…did this motherfucker just crack a joke?”
I don’t like this at all. He was perfect. This is… What’s better than perfect? What’s better than flawless? Fuck, that’s right. He’s Uncle Sam’s Finest Stephen.
He’s a real-life superhero.
I know last week I said something along the lines of, “meh, I’m a dumb ass, let me overthink this shit and fuck it all up”, or whatever dumb shit it was I told y’all. I hope y’all knew I absolutely was not being realistic. Whatever it was I said, garbage. Trash. Rubbish. I lied to us both.
This fucking Marine is the bees’ knees. And he actually cracked a joke once before also. We were talking cash shit to one another, y’all know how I do, acting like he couldn’t fold me literally into pieces the size of granola bars if he wanted to. He said, “listen, I don’t give a fuck if you’re talking to God, when I call, you answer.”
Who the fuck does this dude think he is?
If it wasn’t so funny, I might have had to cuss his ass. Really, I let this one slide so far outta pocket, it’s not cute. I think really, I’m lucky he’s always off saving the world. Because something tells me, if he hung around a while, I would need to wrestle with his ass in the side yard for popping off at the mouth.
I don’t give a fuck about that whole hardest man on this continent reputation. Psssh. *rolls eyes so hard I can see my fucking brain*
Terrifying, indeed.
Let’s conclude with some techno because I gotta get out of my head and onto these hardwood floors in some socks. Y’all keep an eye on me, you know how I get. Better break the glass if I start that dumb shit.
Love- Q
Hell yeah laser kitty, break it
Best jam
I think when all is said and done, we deserve every ounce of silver lining and every scrap of joy we can wrest from this life. Celebrate it, and fuck the consequences. Any kind of love - fan, friend, family, or otherwise - is a thing of beauty that the world needs more of.
As a vet who spent some time around Marines.. and generally likes them (telling you where my warped and slightly twisted head is at) allow me translate the "When I call, you answer" thing, because that ain't about control at all.. it's about care and concern for you.
He's saying he cares, and worries about you, and wouldn't be calling if it weren't important on some level..
Often that level of importance might simply be that he needs to know you're okay so he can focus to go out and be that super hero you appreciate so well.
IOW: When you don't answer (or call back in fairly short order) he worries, possibly enough to distract him from whatever details are at hand.. which can get him hurt or worse.
Girl, grab that shit with both hands and hang on tight.
Note carefully that I don't know the dude, and I'm just offering up a (fairly likely IME) paradigm shift based on what I know about tough guys like Marines.
They tend to be all hard assed and stoic with the public face but they usually have a core of pure marshmallow fluffery and puppies to protect with that hard terse shell.