I Work To Come Up Rap So I Never Forget The Bottom...
It's easy to forget the place you came from, but it's a dangerous thing to do.
“Anywhere, but here, that’s what I told my chauffer,
This shit getting heavy, weight of the world on my shoulders”
Photo by Nathan Dumlao on Unsplash
As most of you know, I come from nothing.
As all of you know, I am not fucking going back.
I don’t sit in my little office, clicking my stiletto heel to the beat of adult contemporary. I still listen to trap shit, come up rap, because it motivates me. If these dudes can sell that much cocaine, I can bust out a few thousand words a night and shut my fucking crying up.
People ask me when I’ll grow out of my fascination with Jeezy; answer- never. Won’t happen. Here’s why; he motivates me. He gets me in my money making mentality. I could be sitting on 3 million, and Jeezy would have me chasing another million before the song ends.
I take a lot of lessons from music. One of which is don’t waste anything you busted your ass to obtain. The other is to watch the people you keep on your team. Both of which will completely leave you fucked if you don’t adhere.
I don’t find Michael Bolton to be a great motivator. Celine Dion doesn’t speak my language. But, someone who clawed their way out of the fucking dirt? Yep. We speak the same damned dialect.
At this very moment, I’m listening to my trap music playlist. Hammering out my 7,000th word of the day. And I’m still looking for another way to squeeze some money out of the predawn hours, because I know for a fact there’s a few more dollars in it. If I leave it, that’s wasteful, so call me greedy if you must.
I have nice things. I busted my ass for all of it. The shit wasn’t gifted.
I have been sexually groped by drunks, sexually assaulted by supervisors, and sexually idolized by a few readers, but I can tell you right now that I didn’t get anything I have on my back. That’s one item ticked off the list- I’m not my mother.
So, although I don’t have too much in common with Streisand, I see eye to eye with Bun-B. I don’t have one of those fuzzy feeling type of backgrounds. I do, however, have the balls to reach out and take what I earned, and I don’t believe in being apologetic about the shit either.
If you think “man, this is a greedy ass bitch over here”, you are absolutely correct. I would rather have it and not need it….
I can still tell you what going to bed hungry feels like. I can still tell you what shoes that didn’t fit feel like. What I can also tell you is I worked so hard to be sure I don’t ever feel them again, and if you think my greed is unattractive, let me advise you, bitch, poverty looks much worse on me.
“I hope my hustle don’t offend nobody,
I could give a fuck what you think about me”. - Jeezy