Doughboy DeSantis Is At It Again...

On everything I love, this dude is as worthless as Mango Mussolini.

This pissant excuse for a politician sickens me.

Bitchfaces, I can’t believe it’s really come to this down here in Floriduh, but mark my words, it has. We have become the simpletons to beat all other simpletons; real life Florida Man is our governor, and he’s fucking shit up at a breakneck pace.

It seems we’re going to be the first state to no longer mandate childhood vaccinations for school registration. Now, some of you granola bitches may be all “rah rah”, or whatever that translates to in Quaker Chewy, but this is a terrible idea.

Allow me to put this in regular Bitchface terms. If we allow people to threaten society as a whole in order to let them feel like they’re “in charge” of their medical decisions, we start to fuck up herd immunity.

If you haven’t heard the term, go back to your 6th grade general science textbooks, and let’s reread the information there. I’ll wait.

Okay, let’s resume.

That would be like me saying, “well, Big Pharma has made drugs too expensive, so I will be returning to the sale of oxycodone for the greater good of people in pain.”

Do you think that the fine people at the DEA are going to just go, “oh, she’s totally right. Let’s give her a pass.”

Fuck no. They’re going to come at me with another RICO case, and I’m going back to the federal penitentiary for a term of no less than 72 months, followed by another 60 months on parole.

“But people should be free to decide what they put in their bodies.” Right. Because that argument works so well when it’s people on street drugs saying that about crack cocaine.

No. No, you should not be able to decide for another family that your little snot nosed fucking brat can infect them with the measles and kill every kid in their fucking house.

Absolutely not, Calliope, and we’ll need you to stop burning that goddamned sage all over the first-grade classroom as well. Whatever you’re trying to dispel, it’s probably already in your unvaccinated kid, so get it out of here.

Fuck.

You know what? I’d like to punch Jenny McCarthy in her fucking face for being the tits behind this movement. And while I’m at it, Oprah can get some too.

Y’all. There is a reason that we have scientists. The reason is that all of us aren’t fucking Galileo, so we need someone to look at the tiny little bugs in a dish and tell us what is okay, and what will shrivel us up and render us a vegetable.

I happen to be a STEM degree holder, but even I know I’m not a fucking MD, therefore, smarter people than myself need to guide me toward a decision that makes sense for the health and well-being of everyone in my immediate community. It’s called not being a selfish piece of shit and actually giving a fuck who your poor ass decisions affect.

Try caring about someone other than yourself, Indigo. Get little Brantleigh her shots, and shut the fuck up about your “research”, which consists of 2 TikTok videos, under 60 seconds each, and a fucking Facebook post that your dumb ass cousin forwarded to you when you were 8 months pregnant.

Your year of community college doesn’t make you the smartest bitch at the daycare pick-up, and that’s not the level of intelligence we need when determining what vaccinations are necessary to fucking keep us alive.

Fuck.

Get fucking real, people. Jesus.

-Q